Tuesday, March 21, 2023

Omelas

 I don't think I'm okay.


I have lived a very charmed life. Honestly, I think the biggest shit I've experienced are all related with school. My parents never made me feel I was lacking, though. I was raised to believe that I am special and I could achieve great things as long as I work hard for it.


But that's the thing.. lately, I've been feeling like I'm not destined for exceptional things.. that maybe, maybe I'm just headed for a lackluster, average life. That's something that sets me off - I'm not prepared for the average. I have always prepared myself for something more. And more than this realization, it's killing me that I couldn't ever show my parents that.. glow. I'm just so sad.


A lot of people, for the longest time, would message me (and even tell me in real life) on how much they admire how strong I am, how resilient I am, how I'm such a fighter. But, dear God, I'm so tired. Why do I always have to fight for my place in this world? I'm so tired of being strong. I'm so tired

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