Life's a big party full of party crashers and drunkards and chain smokers and surprises with cakes swirling with marshmallow bits&colorful sprinkled sweets. This party could go on for days with continuous servings of tequilas or daquiri/s. This party is full of sweat, smoke, and noise.

It only ends when the music stops & the liquor bottle drops. It only stops when everybody gets to think that, "Ohnoes. I left the iron turned on -- it's going to burn my house."

But without being sober -- life's one hell of a brain-tweezing party.

I guess it's up to you if you'll enjoy the overflowing drinks, the ear-busting music, and the polluted air drifting and sliding inside your nostrils. It's up to you.

SONG: The Honorary Title's Bridge And Tunnel.

.. Last year, I used to have LOVE problems. Now, I have FRIENDS problems. Last year, I know the people to turn to when I'm feeling so suicidal. Now, I don't even know who to talk to anymore. Last year, we were sooooo BONDED. Now, we're slowly falling apart. Last year, I used to rant all day and all night how I wish that everything would just end -- how I'm looking forward to the future. Now, all I want to do is bring back the good old times and hug everyone close.

Somehow, 2008 seems more like a peachy year than 2009. How I wish I knew it back then.

We were supposed to stick with each other FOREVER. Now, EVERYBODY'S busy with their stupid schools and stupid new "friends" and stupid new environment and stupid new crushes. Everything's so stupid. Even this life is stupid. Stupid school. Stupid everything. Well, ok, they keep on saying that they miss HS but they don't show it. It's as if I'm facing a different.. Ugh. Nevermind. It's too stupid to say anyway.

I hope my family decides to migrate to a new country or something. Then, I would have a fresh start and, well, maybe, JUST MAYBE -- they would finally show that they miss me after all. 'Cause, honestly, it's as if I'm the ONLY ONE who's trying to reach out and make papansin. Nakakairita na, alam nyo 'yun? Nakakairita.

A single "HELLO" would suffice. We're friends. SUPPOSEDLY. College SHOULD'VE been our glue or tape or whatever.. Why? Dude, lahat tayo Frosh. Hindi dahil nag-college at nagkaron ka na ng bagong friends, kakalimutan mo 'yung dati. Akala ko ok na dati. I thought we resolved our issues na. Sana hindi nalang pala tayo nag-usap dati dahil wala din namang nangyari diba? Masyado ka ng masaya ngayon, nakalimutan mo na ako. 'Yun 'yung pinaka-masakit, alam mo ba? I treated you as a SUPER FRIEND tas wala din. Sinasabe mo na mahal mo ako pero actually -- you're just saying that. It's exactly what it is -- WORDS. Hindi mo naman pinapakita ehh.

Some of my closest HS "friends" are either busy or jerks. No time for Rina. And to think na ngayon ko kayo pinaka-kailangan.

A piece of advice: Treasure every second that you’re with your HS friends. ‘Cause, honestly, when you’re in College — all you’ll ever do is wish that you could turn back the time and hold your friends close. College kills. Well, yeah, you meet a lot of great people but your HS friends would always be the one you’ll turn to when you’re worn out.

That's all. Oh, BTW, I have a tumblr account: monkeyculture.tumblr.com.

SONG: Vegas Skies by The Cab.

While everybody's posting all those "I LOVE COLLEGE!", "I LOVE MY LIFE!" tralalas -- I would just like to say that THEY never really enjoyed HS that much. HS is the MOST.. I dunno.. It's the HAPPIEST. Although, I don't want to be a hypocrite here -- Maybe it's the happiest for me since I'm only a Frosh and, OHYEAH, I hate my school. I never asked for College in the first place. I'm so sorry if I'm being a bitch -- I'm just having the awful-est year in my life.

I envy the people who got in to their dream schools.

I envy the people who are just so plain happy with College right now.

Why can't I be like that? Why can't I love UST? Whhhhy? I don't know how many times I've ranted about CollegeBooooHooo's but, yeah, I need an outlet -- and I don't know who I should talk to anymore since EVERYBODY'S enjoying their stupid College Lives now.

I don't have anybody right now. They're all about College. They're all about their stupid new friends. They're all about their posh lives. Somehow, it's just me. It'll always just be me.

SONG: Anne Hathaway's Somebody To Love.

It's final -- I am so going to try to ace that DLSU test. Hindi na ako matutulog sa exam. Hindi ko na tutulugan. I promise.

Happy Birthday Yo.

I have a new haircut. Side bangs, baby. But, it's not very obvious since I tuck it under my ear. :)) School sucks. Especially after the whole quiet thingy system. It makes me want to skip the entire remaining semester. I think I'm serious about my decision to switch schools next year. Ayoko na sa UST. Then again, in the first place, ayoko talaga sa UST. I know I'm bitching over UST kahit wala naman silang ginagawa saken. It's because of some, um, personal reasons. Basta. I really want to transfer next year.

I think I had a hard time adjusting this year because I was suddenly in a very different place. New school. New dorm. New people. Are you getting me? If I were living with my family -- I think adjusting would be a piece of cake. But, ohno, I was in a very different place all of a sudden. What would you feel if you were in my shoes? And to think that I don't like the dorm and I don't like the school. See? Are you getting my point? One time, it's kinda awkward 'cause my roommate saw me crying. I told her I miss being with my family. I miss eating homecooked meals. I miss seeing my brother. I miss charging my phone and my iPod in the bedroom.

College was beginning to get fun last, last, last week. But then, the events of last, last week happened and I kinda wished that I'm not in UST after all. If you asked me if I want to transfer to a different school last, last, last week -- I would've slapped you and banged your head on the table and yell, "NO!" Now? I would've looked at you, teary-eyed, and say, "Can I please, please transfer next sem?" That's how BAD it is.

On a different topic, Yam would be celebrating her birthday tomorrow. YAY! FREE FOOD! And, 2 days after that -- Yo would be turning a year older! More free food! But, we'll probably celebrate it on the weekends -- when we're together as a family.

So, yeah, goodbye. I'm off to dry my hair.

SONG: The Gift by Angels And Airwaves.

I'm starting to get gay. Again. Not gay-gay, gay-boybands-stuff. That kind of gay. School's getting pretty oh-some. I'm loving my blockmates. Especially Jonah Ventura. I think she's my favorite. :> :))

Actually, I'm torn. I dunno if I still want to transfer to another school next year or if I should just stay in UST. Personally, I do not love UST; I don't like it. Ever. I just love my blockmates. Are you getting me? I love the people around me but I hate the place. I want AdMU so bad it hurts. :| Anyway, if I'm gonna transfer to another school -- prolly it would be in DLSU. 'Cause it's the one nearest the house. Pwede akong mag-bike lang. NO JOKE. That's why I was sort of devastated when I didn't get in. I was really hoping I would nail DLSU -- but I didn't. That's why I'm bitter.

Well, my plan is to go to DLSU. And when I get tuper duper successful -- I would make AdMU regret everything. It's time to play with the enemy. Geez. I'm so bitter. :| Still.

SO ANYWAY. I dunno if I still want to transfer to a different school. God, I need a sign. Kasi you know that I don't like UST. Never. As in kahit kelan hindi ko nagustuhan ang UST. :(( I just love my blockmates. Yun lang talaga. Minsan nga sabe ko sana nag-St. Scho nalang ako. Anywhere but UST. :(( I'm so sorry sa mga loyalists out there.

SONG: Liquid Dreams by O-Town.