Saturday, February 2, 2013

Been Talkin' 'Bout The Way Things Change.

I think this is a very appropriate song for what I'm feeling right now:


A year from now we'll all be gone
All our friends will move away
And they're goin' to better places
But our friends will be gone away

Nothin' is as it has been
And I miss your face like hell
And I guess it's just as well
But I miss your face like hell

[Chanting]

Been talkin' 'bout the way things change
And my family lives in a different state
If you don't know what to make of this
Then we will not relate
So if you don't know what to make of this
Then we will not relate

[Chanting]

Rivers and roads
Rivers and roads
Rivers 'til I reach you
[Repeat 9x]


I don't like change.  The mere thought of it scares the living hell out of me and makes me want to shit on my undies.  When I get too comfortable..  It makes me want stuff to stay the same forever, you know?  Ugh.  I don't know why I'm desperately clinging on to things that are inevitably gonna change.  Does that make sense?

I always say that I just want this school year to end and stuff but now that I'm finally nearing graduation, I want to take everything back.  I'm really, really scared of the future.  I wouldn't see my friends everyday and, sooner or later, we're all going to grow apart and stuff.  AND I HATE THAT FEELING.  I hate IT.  I didn't invest three years of my life and self to my friends just so we wouldn't be friends in the future.  Are you getting me?  I don't think I'm making any sense here, I'm sorry.

I've experienced that feeling when I started college.  Some of my closest friends in high school are strangers now.  And it just kills me, you know?  In some ways, I guess I'm just afraid to experience that same feeling again.

Anyway, whatever.  Listen to the song - it makes the difficult stuff bearable.