Saturday, August 9, 2008

i found some kind of fairytale

it's over. it's done.. no farewells, no anything.. just a word. over.

i guess i can breathe again. after two weeks of uncertainties, incertitudes, doubts, and even false hopes, i guess i'm f-r-e-e again.

i've said before that there are other worlds to sing in.. my only problem is that whenever i start to hum, i mess it up by humming something irritatingly off-key. i can't find the proper tune. i don't know when to start and when to end. i don't know if i should begin with something upbeat or something more serious.

ever since i was a kid, i had a problem with tempo and beat. i can't say the difference between a 4/4 and a 2/4 time signature. they're all the same to me. just like now, i don't know if i'm in the middle of a long piano piece, or if i'm half-way a tear-jerking funeral march (humming, most probably), or if i'm just singing things by myself.

Ugh. College. School. Pure torture. I just want to run away and not look back. I want to throw away this heavy load I'm carrying and forget that I ever started this journey.

I know I'm longing for things I wouldn't and I couldn't have. But, these stuff are the only reasons why I still act sane around you guys.. It couldn't be helped. It's either insanity or these hopeless fantasies.. Then again, what's the difference?

Life's bound to get better. Soon.

Song: Vanessa Carlton's Nolita Fairytale :)

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